Big mistake: assuming that others communicate the same as
you.
Have you ever experienced being able to relate easily and
comfortable with certain people yet other people are
difficult
to talk to? This article explains how this happens and how
to
solve this important problem.
Many an important project has been derailed because of poor
communication. Do not make the BIG mistake of assuming that
others communicate the same as you. All people do not
communicate alike. Recognize that about two thirds of
the people with whom you interact have a behavioral style
different from yours. To be effective with these two thirds,
you must learn to recognize and adapt your behavior to
theirs -- and your will triple your ability to make friends
and influence people.
You will then have powerful tools for:
1. Gaining Commitment and Cooperation
2. Resolving and Preventing Conflict
3. Building Effective Teams
4. Providing Awesome Customer Service
5. Gaining Influence
~Stan
How to Be a Great Communicator--Lesson I.
To be a great communicator you must first:
1. Understand your own communication style.
2. Recognize other's communication style.
3. Purposely adopt strategies for more effective
communication.
To easily understand behavior-observe whether a person is:
1. Introverted or extroverted
2. Task oriented or people oriented
This gives you four communication styles:
1. Extroverted and task oriented
2. Extroverted and people oriented
3. Introverted and task oriented
4. Introverted and people oriented
To become a great communicator begin by observing yourself
1. Are you more introverted or extroverted. When challenged
by a situation, do you hang back to see what develops and
try to figure out the best way to handle the situation,
or do you immediately step forward to meet the challenge.
Note that neither approach is superior. They both have
their advantages.
2. Are you task oriented or people oriented-more focused on
getting the job done even at the expense of people, or is
your first concern the reaction of the people involved?
3. Discover into which of the four categories (described
above)
you fall.
Understanding this about yourself will start you on your way
to becoming a Great Communicator.
Lesson II
QUICK METHOD OF DETERMINING YOUR BEHAVIORAL STYLE
Knowing your own communication style is the first step in
becoming a great communicator. It gives you a basis to
understand to whom you naturally communicate well and what
you need to do to connect well to people with other styles.
Take this quick assessment to understand your style. In each
of the four category lists below there are 10 adjectives.
Check all those in each category that would fit your
behavior
at work.
Read the four categories and select which adjectives come
closest to describing you.
Count the number of selected adjectives in each category.
The
category with the highest total is usually the one that best
describes your style. You may have a second category with
almost the same score. That would be your secondary style.
============================================
[Please note: the assessment offered you in session II of
this
newsletter is a simplified and therefor less accurate
assessment
than that provided by longer, validated instruments. For a
FREE,
more accurate, refined and valid profile of your
communication
style, visit
http://www.stanmann.com/free-assessment.html
============================================
Lesson THREE
UNDERSTANDING YOUR PARTICULAR STYLE
After having completed the check list from last Lesson's
letter, you have determined your behavior falls into
CATEGORY 1, 2, 3 or 4.
IF YOUR BEHAVIOR IS LIKE CATEGORY 1.
Category 1 Measures your Dominance; how you meet challenges.
We will now refer to this as CATEGORY D [for Dominance.]
YOUR STRENGTHS ARE
· Direct, results oriented
· Interested in getting the job done
· Enjoys challenges
· Like novelty and a fast paced environment
· A quick thinker
· A big picture person
· Have a lot of drive
· A natural leader
· Lets others know where you stand
· Takes charge
If your behavior is primarily described in category D,
you are most likely a direct, results oriented person
who enjoys challenges. An extrovert, you are interested
in getting the job done. You like novelty and a fast
paced environment. You want bottom line answers uncluttered
by details. These strengths make you valuable to an
organization because you cause action, get things done,
even if it involves taking risks. You have a lot of drive
and can make a good leader
Shortcomings of CATEGORY D
However, you probably lack patience and cut people off
with your direct bottom line approach. Your overriding
concern with results tends to discount the people
involved. You may be a poor listener and miss valuable
insights from others. Under stress you may become
insensitive.
HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR EFFECTIVENESS.
You can improve your effectiveness by understanding that
you need people. Learn patience and be less irritated when
deadlines are missed. It would help you to be more tactful
and concerned for the feelings and attitudes of others.
People will be more cooperative when you explain your
reasons for your conclusions. Endorse others for their
contributions. Remember they like it as much as you.
Genuine endorsement is a powerful motivator.
FLEXING YOUR STYLE TO INCREASE YOUR EFFECTIVENESS
People more like yourself will respond well to your direct,
fast paced, decisive approach. You don't have to flex your
style with these people.
However, you will do well to modify your approach to people
who behave more like described in the other three
categories.
Learn the three styles of other people and flex your style
accordingly. Future newsletters will give you specific keys
for adapting communication to all four categories.
THIS ARTICLE COVERED:
- Biggest mistake when trying to communicate with others.
- Three things you must do to become a powerful
communicator.
- How to quickly identify the four basic communication
styles.
- Quick method of determining your behavioral style
- Understanding Category I [Dominate] style
- Category I strong points
- Compensating for Category I limitations.
FUTURE ARTICLES:
We will describe CATEGORY 2,3 AND 4 behaviors.
- Their strengths and possible weaknesses
- Tips for improving effectiveness
- How to flex your style to win others to your views
