"Master the Art of Being Rejected "
By Eve Delunas, Ph.D. |
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How good are you at being rejected? The ability to handle
rejection is one of the most important skills we can master in
life. As you pursue your dreams, there will always be those who
will tell you that you just aren't good enough. The road to the
attainment of our goals is rarely rejection-free. Yet, when doors
are slammed in our faces, many of us conclude we must be on the
wrong track. It is amazing how willing we are to abandon our
heartfelt dreams because someone else doesn't believe in us.
A close look at anyone who has achieved greatness will reveal
there was plenty of rejection along the way. Take J.K. Rowling,
for example. Every single publisher in Britain, and all but one
in the U.S., rejected her first Harry Potter book. Many could
offer her lots of reasons why the book would never sell.
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Bill Clinton lost an election for the governor of Arkansas years
before he was elected president of the U.S.
Steve Jobs suffered public humiliation when he was fired by the
company he founded--Apple Computer. Today he is once again
leading Apple to even bigger and better accomplishments.
When U.S. Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg graduated
from law school, not one major law firm offered her a job.
Some other stories of rejection among well-known achievers:
--Walt Disney lost his job at a newspaper because his editor
accused him of "having no good ideas." Later, Walt founded a
cartoon production company that went bankrupt.
--Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team.
--A producer sent a memo regarding Fred Astaire's 1928 screen
test that said "Can't act. Can't sing. Balding. Can dance a
little." Fred acquired the original memo years later, so he could
frame it and hang it over his fireplace.
--Albert Einstein did so poorly in school that a teacher
suggested he quit, telling him, "Einstein, you will never amount
to anything."
--At 21, F.W. Woolworth was employed in a dry goods store. His
employer refused to let him wait on customers because he "didn't
have enough sense."
--Early in her career, Lucille Ball had a reputation as a failed
actress and a "B-Movie Queen."
SIX STEPS TO MASTERING THE ART OF REJECTION
In spite of the rejection they encountered, these individuals
persevered. Each was challenged to believe in himself or herself
when others didn't. Each refused to allow someone else's negative
opinion to become a roadblock in the pursuit of lifelong dreams.
You, too, can use the inevitable rejection that comes your way to
fortify your belief in yourself and fuel your progress. Here are
six steps you can take to master the art of being rejected:
1. Let rejection be a signal to go inward, and do some soul-
searching. Ask yourself: What do I really desire to create in my
life? Am I pursuing this path because it is truly what I want, or
is it what someone else wants for me? Then write down your goals.
2. Use rejection as an opportunity to better yourself. Ask for
constructive criticism. Take note of any ways you can perform
better next time. Would it help to take a class or read a book on
the subject? Then do it.
3. Reconnect with your inner guidance. Close your eyes and ask
yourself what the next step is for you. Be still and the answer
will come--either right away, or in the next few weeks. Your
inner guidance is always moving you towards something, rather
than away from something. It gently nudges you to take those
actions which will enable the fulfillment of your desires.
4. Remember to lighten up and have fun along the way. When you
are following your bliss, you are in alignment with your higher
purpose. Let your life be a joyful adventure, in which the
journey is as important as the destination. Try not to take
yourself so seriously.
5. Remind yourself that encounters with those who do not believe
in you are an opportunity to strengthen your belief in yourself,
and your commitment to following your inner guidance. Only you
hold the map of your life territory within you. Others cannot
possibly know what is right for you, or what you are capable of
doing, being, or having.
6. Visualize the attainment of your dreams. Put your body in a
comfortable position, either seated or lying down. Close your
eyes, and take some deep breaths. Imagine that it is a year from
now, and that all of your dreams have become a reality. Create a
movie in your mind, in which you live those dreams. Make it as
real as you can. Be lighthearted and playful with your
imagination. Get excited about it. Use all of your senses. Don't
worry if you can't see things clearly--its okay if you just sense
what it feels like to have attained your goals.
7. Celebrate your rejections, for they are a sure sign that you
are stepping out of your comfort zone and living your life to the
fullest!
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Eve Delunas, Ph.D., psychotherapist, author, speaker, trainer.
Offers proven strategies to help you rise above your limitations
and soar. Breaking the Spell of the Past--Book and Guided
Visualization CD set. Take a FREE QUIZ to find out if you are
SPELLBOUND by your past. Download a FREE guided meditation to
relieve stress and feel more peaceful. Sign up for a FREE monthly
ezine called AWAKENING INNER VISION: RESOURCES FOR ENLIGHTENMENT.
Go to: http://www.innervisionresources.com
mailto:eve@innervisionresources.com
